This past year I have felt God pressing on me to get back to writing. I have had a blog off and on, and written here and there, but with no regularity.
It’s an outlet, helps me process, and it’s a way of sharing and (hopefully!) encouraging or helping others.
I felt this press over the summer of 2013.
Since then, I have done just about every thing possible to distract me or justify my not stepping out in obedience.
I got on a sewing kick (I don’t even really like sewing?!)…making up imaginary deadlines in my head of when things had to be done by. I started home renovations, deciding now was a perfect time to redo my cabinets and floors. I have legitimate responsibilities, like 3 children, feeding them, pick ups, schedules and appointments, laundry (does it ever end?!), and keeping a home running. Ain’t nobody got time for that.
Then, when I actually had moments to think about this, I allowed fear and doubt to creep in.
I have nothing new to say. My blog isn’t cute…it needs to be cute. My pictures won’t be good enough. What if instead of encouraging women, I accidentally say something stupid that detracts from that (a very real possibility with my mouth and rawness)? What if while meaning to help with dinner ideas, I become the obnoxious, intimidating food lady? I don’t want to be obnoxious or give anyone a sense of insecurity. These are just a few surface level fears, not even getting into the more deeper fears of inadequacy.
The New Year rolled around, and quite literally every single day I have woke up with the intention of taking a step in obedience.
And every day I have not.
Thirteen days of a weight and purpose over my head that I have let fear win. Not to mention the 6 months before that.
Well, today it stops. Fear is not winning today, obedience is.
So I ask you, what is fear keeping you from today? What are ways you are felling called to step out in obedience? Are you supposed to make a phone call? Serve others in a new, unknown way? Step out of your comfort zone in the office? Walk into that space full of new people? Spend time with God every morning? (Because as a mom of young kids, we all know this is an act only accomplished with the strength of the Lord!)
Whatever it is, as someone who has let fear control her for too many days, I encourage you to “…lay aside every weight and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith…”(Hebrews 12:1-2 ESV, read for more context). Because, “God gave us NOT a spirit of fear, but of power, love and self-control.” (2 Timothy 1:7, ESV, again, emphasis mine, read for full context)
Don’t let fear win today.
And welcome…to my blog.